I tried to write this post when I first found out that I had made the Women Beyond the Box list, but honestly, I could not put the words together. It’s funny how things work out. Sometimes the timing can be the thing that spurs you on when you’ve been questioning why you’re putting yourself through all this when you just need a bloody good sleep and some time alone.

I can’t believe I had the confidence to put my name in the hat for this list. I never really thought I would be selected. The list of women I have the privilege to be selected alongside is awe inspiring. Such a varied collection of life stories weaved together by the common thread of carving a career space that works for, or with, our neurodivergence. Another theme that stands out is how so many of the women are lifting others up; our sensitivity to justice shines through.

“This is the 3rd WBTB list following our launch in 2019. ‘The List’ is a campaign focused on centering the career experiences of Neurodivergent women. With intersectionality at its core, this is a unique careers resource which serves as a roadmap for Neurodivergent women at work. Stories that have not been told and faces that have not yet been seen. Collectively shifting the culture and influencing their work environment.” Emma Case, Founder - Women Beyond The Box.

You can find the list and read more about it here Top 50 Influential Neurodivergent Women 2023

And just like that (*insert wind emoji and ‘poof’ sound), the holidays are over and it’s right back to work. Must admit that I am still absolutely shattered, post flu and post neurodivergent Christmas overstimulation. But the list of things to do goes on, and this week starts with the 2023 International Symposium of Autoethnography and Narrative, followed by finishing the first draft of an article with a looming deadline, and checking submission dates for the International Association of Illustration Academics 2023 exhibition. To be fair, the pressure of deadlines help when you’re ADHD and they’re coming thick and fast!

I have found it so useful editing my website. It’s funny how so much changes as you’re ploughing through your work. I haven’t had the time to stop and think about how the work has evolved, or even how I have evolved as an illustrator. I mentioned before on a recent Instagram post that I haven’t made as much as I should have, or wanted to. I get so taken with the reading and research that goes on in the background; I hear in my mind the words of Rachel Gannon and Mireille Fauchon “Everything is your practice” (an introduction to the manifesto for illustration pedagogy: a lexicon for contemporary illustration practice, 2018). This is so very true. Despite not creating as much as I would have liked up to this point, I was easily able to chop work from the website knowing that this is not how I practice anymore. Saying that, I think it is important that there is space for WIPs, quick responses, ideation, sketchbooks and material exploration on our websites, it shows how we think and move through our subject matter. I guess it’s a sign of growth and I’m not attached to my old skin. Future illustrator me will be just as brutal to present illustrator me at some point.

What I have enjoyed is stepping back and realising how much I have actually done over the first two years of this research journey. I have heard the second year can feel like trudgin through mud, but as an ADHDer, the lack of structure and slippery timeframe can be difficult. It takes real discipline to keep going towards this this no-end-in-sight goal. For the ‘studio | academia’ section of this website, I started to look up visual evidence of all of the things I had done. Again, as an ADHDer, it’s ingrained in my very being to have to prove myself, prove I can and actually have done something, and it’s the same with forming opinions and knowledge; always looking for the source of what I’m saying. Probably why I get into the reading and researching so much! Finding links to achievements like being awarded the Mary Ann McCracken award gave a real sense of pride. To be the first to be awarded by the foundation, and have my work recognised as aligning with such a revolutionary force for justice and equality is, well, I find it hard to use words that do the feeling justice.

And to have my photo on the same page as Professor David Olusoga OBE… I’m torn between doing a dance and having a lie down. Might do both.

Mary Ann McCracken Foundation